Author: chunhui

程光陰似箭，正念家庭幸福密碼第二系列開課了。鄭美心老師於5/23所帶來的課程提到有關《愛的旅程與孩子和解》。在每個人的生命中都渴望被愛以及被尊重。愛的基本需求如生理、安全、歸屬的需求、自尊與受人尊敬的需求，以及自我實現的需求等被滿足時，才能健康成长。透過照顧者的被關注，被接納，被欣賞，被情感，被容許，孩子對愛的需求自然而然會被滿足。針對為兒童解決問題，著重於根本。在還未能幫助孩子之前，先檢視和探討家長的原生家庭經歷。接著，鄭老師鼓勵家長們踴躍分享觀看影片後的心得，藉此勉勵大眾不要複製上一代的教養偏差給下一代讓它蔓延下去。事與願違，基於許多不同因素，如家長忙碌、性別不平等的觀念、家庭變化、比較競爭、功利的價值觀以及各種條件式的愛等剝奪了孩子被愛的權力。寬恕是一種美德，與自己和解、與他人和解，原諒別人就是寬恕自己。

17/5/2021 – “Joyful Dharma” Reading Club Report

Topic: Buddha-dharma: Pure & Simple – Dual Cultivation of Merit and Wisdom

A total of 25 participants attended this week’s reading session facilitated by Elder Advisor Sister Lillian.

From the passage written by Venerable Master Hsing Yun, the dual cultivation of merit and wisdom should be equally emphasised with practice and understanding, knowledge and action, as well as listening and experiencing to complete the practice of Buddhism. From the discussion that follows, Elder Advisor Sister Lillian created some awareness and self-examination among the readers by questioning what they understand about dual cultivation and how one should go about practicing them in life.

Some readers shared their early experiences and how they cultivated both merit and wisdom by doing the 3 good deeds, helping people to solve problems, being patient to listen to one’s problem, participating in charity activities, reading sutras and listening to dharma talks, joining dharma classes or reading clubs and so on. We also hear sharings from our dharma brothers that cultivation of merit and wisdom require the perfection of wisdom and generosity as well as observance of precepts, meditative concentration and prajna wisdom so that one can contemplate to gain true wisdom. Other ways of practice also includes prostrating to the Buddha and meditation practice to purify one’s mind. In reality, some may not be able to practice the dual cultivation due to one’s background, causes and effects, conditions and affinities. Nevertheless, a practitioner of the bodhisattva’s path should not stick to only one method and should always try to have a good balance by reading sutras and learning the Dharma to cultivate both virtues.

As a reflection of this topic, we revere the advise of Venerable Master Hsing Yun that when one listens to, contemplates upon, and practices the Dharma, one is essentially “entering the attainment of samadhi through listening, contemplation and practice”, which ultimately increases our insights and capacity to acquire merit and enhance our wisdom.

The class ended with a “Prayer Before Retiring for the Day” followed by Transference of Merits. May we dedicate the merits from the learning and sharing of the Buddha-Dharma to all sentient being, may all be safe and well.

Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!

在今天的开心读书会里我们谈了”—句话”出自星云大师的”人间万事”。

首先，由读书会帶领人吴丽莉师姐以深入浅出的方式讲解宣讲员三段式的演说。她也分享了—些人生的教学经验和小故事。她说生命是—种学习，任何人在学习的过程中，难免会遇到困难和迷惑，给人”—句好话”，让人生命奋起飞扬，何乐而不为呢？她也希望大家可以常常说，”给人欢喜的话，给人鼓励的话，给人肯定的话和给人赞叹的话”。因为”一句好话”会影响一个人的成败或反转他的人生，什至有所悟而豁然开朗。

接着，大家也互相提出个人的感想，如何给人”—句好话”为他人带来正能量，乃至於结下善缘。

反过来说，假如”—句话”沖口而出，说者无意，听者有心，大家为了个人的立場，因而影响心情和懊恼，背负着沉重的包袱而放不下，为了—句微不足道的话而耿耿於怀，这又何苦呢？

妙道法师开示时说”—好句话”固然重要，但是囗不择言的话，听听就好，不必放在心上，雖然当下会生气但是冷静和反省过后，就要把它释放。然而听了”—句好话”要把它记下来，好好的去实践，用在生活中。法师也以“结好缘，不结怨缘”来勉励大家。

总结来说，我们应该謹言慎行，以柔软的语气，诚懇的态度与人沟通。多亲近善知识，多阅读星云大师的祈愿文和多做回向功德，就不会为了”—句话”而破坏了好因好缘。

转眼间，今年度第二场的线上视讯开锣了。荣幸邀请佛光文教中心副住持如行法师为大众分享《佛法真义》之无我。首先，咱们以蝴蝶手语给自己爱的抱抱。意指在疫情之下要懂得照顾别人之前，先好好爱自己;以正能量面对时下负面疫情情绪。

今天探讨《无我》文章中，提到”无我”不是说现在的这个我是没有的。在佛法里”无我”的”我”是变化的。随着岁月流逝，时时刻刻都在变化当中。世间万物都处在变化状态。问世间，哪还有真实不变的东西呢？一切变化非自作，亦非他作，乃由因缘而生，因缘灭则灭。

“无我”不是说’没有我’。不等于不存在，而是去除对”我”的执着。众生正因为有”我”，没有办法理解”无我”理念而造成许多有悲苦恼。

万般带不走，唯有业随身。因缘而合的作用，再好的风水都不及实施三好[说好话，做好事，存好心]来改变命运以达到”无我”境界。如’火’是由因缘而来的，当因缘没有了就会消失了。不要总是探究’事’的本质，一切皆有因缘而合的机缘。强大的执著，心的执着，力量非常强大的。

所谓”无我”意味着无所不能，内心变强大。上能与帝皇同坐，下能和乞丐同齐。可苦可甜，一切都”无我”积极地去创造生命。”无我”思维以别人为主和处处为人着想，拥有心的自由。

适逢同日是温馨的母亲节，借此机会祝福天下所有的母亲们 – 母亲节快乐!线上家长班就在充满佳节气氛之下圆满结束。